Cement Steps

January 8, 2006

Lying in bed in that oh-so-familiar stage...I'm tired and know that I should go to sleep,but at the same time I want to stay up. I want to read or write or play Radiata Stories or look at a magazine. Something quiet while this house is still mine. What if I miss something? When I go to sleep, it just brings me screamingly close to that horrible moment of waking up to Niko's cries or the alarm. Worst part of the day.

A week ago I turned my ankle while walking down our steep, cement steps. I was carrying Niko, who still can't climb stairs, and my ankle rolled. I grabbed the handrail with my free hand, totally slamming into it with that arm. The area from my wrist to my elbow just throbbed. Niko was completely okay, and in fact, giggled pretty wildly. He keeps everything in perspective. My ankle was sore for a few days, felt better, and is aching again. Running, maybe? It keeps popping.

So tomorrow, after running and Niko's school, we got to the hospital to pick up meds, get labs, and do an unsedated heart echo. I'm dreading the long, painful day, with a very sleepy Niko being restrained and echoed and pricked, but I'm hoping there's more good news. Last time it was all wonderful, and a girl could get used to hearing happy things about her son.