Wednesday, August 05, 2009

The Goose Egg

It's a crazy time. Luke's still doing his busy season, and last week he put in his 40 hours by Wednesday. The kids and I spend a lot of time looking at pictures of Daddy.

Today I said, "Enough!" I hired a babysitter. I called my friend and asked her to lunch, if she could drive. Afterward we went to a matinee, and guess what was playing? My Sister's Keeper. Most of you know that I'm not into chick flicks at all, and most certainly not tear jerkers, but we went, and I cried during the entire thing. I remember a time when Niko was going into kidney failure, and there was discussion about whether our next child would be a "donor child". In fact, I think I mentioned it briefly on this blog. But we are lucky, and after his levels were stabilized, life was beautiful for our son. Nina gets to be Nina. She isn't spare parts for her brother. But even if that had to be the case, she's such a gracious, giving little girl that I know she'd do anything to help Niko in a heartbeat.

I'm on pins and needles right now about her. She was outside on the patio, and I don't know if she fell or if Niko pushed her, and I suppose it doesn't really matter. She hit the concrete with a sickening sound, and immediately formed the biggest goose egg on her forehead that I've ever seen. I picked her up. I cuddled her. I gave her some children's Tylenol and put some ice on her forehead. I looked up "goose egg on forehead" and everything tells me to check her eyes, to check her actions, to see if her speech is slurred. She seems all right. She stopped crying quickly, and was pointing out dogs, cats. "Ruff ruff, meow," she said. She was alert, and was tired after a while, but it was bedtime. The advice I found said to let her sleep, but wake her up periodically. Luke's on his way home from work, and we'll wake her up when he gets here. I feel that she's all right, but I'll keep a darn close eye on her. I'm afraid it's going to be a very long night. Luke will give her a blessing, and that will give us peace of mind.

The good news is that my parents are coming down this weekend so Luke and I can run a race. His race starts at around midnight, and mine starts at 1:00 AM. We'll run by Area 51 during the full moon, and last year it was such a mystical, beautiful thing. I'm looking forward to it, and I'm excited to see my parents. We'll have Nina's birthday party while they're here.

It made me feel better to see so many blog posts devoted to goose eggs. We all feel like our mommy license should be revoked. We all feel inadequate. It's comforting because I feel that way a lot. There's strength in numbers, isn't there?

1 comment:

Katie said...

Yes there is- and if it makes you feel better, one time I was babysitting a friend's 6 month old and let him fall out of his carseat which was on the kitchen counter (terrible!). I called your old friend Brady since he is an ER doc and you know what he asked me? Is there any blood or gray fluid coming out of anywhere on his head? Gray fluid!!?? It was strangely comforting to know that as bad as I felt, at least the kids brains weren't oozing out of his eye sockets!